How-to Navigate Thanksgiving with a Picky Eater

Happy family are having dinner at home. Celebration holiday and togetherness serving festive Turkey meal.

Thanksgiving is a cherished time for family, gratitude, and delicious food. However, for families with picky eaters, the holiday can bring added stress. How do you ensure your child enjoys the meal while keeping the day festive and stress-free? With insights from Pediatric Dietitian experts at From the Start Nutrition, here are practical strategies to make Thanksgiving enjoyable for everyone.

Understanding Picky Eating

Picky eating is a normal part of childhood development, often peaking in toddlerhood and improving with age. Dr. Linsenmeyer emphasizes that parents shouldn’t panic if their child’s diet isn’t perfectly balanced every day. Instead, focus on patterns over time. Thanksgiving is just one meal in the grand scheme of your child’s diet.

If your child only eats rolls or whipped cream on Thanksgiving, that’s okay! The next day provides an opportunity to return to more balanced eating. The goal is to create a positive experience around food rather than turning the meal into a battle.

How-to Navigate Thanksgiving with a Picky Eater

1. Bring Familiar Foods

One of the easiest ways to accommodate a picky eater is to bring foods they already enjoy. Whether it’s macaroni and cheese, chicken nuggets, or a favorite fruit, having a familiar option can reduce stress for both you and your child. Bringing a “safe food” ensures your child has something to eat while still being part of the celebration. It also prevents them from feeling overwhelmed by all of the unfamiliar dishes, sights, smells, and commotion

2. Communicate Expectations

Before Thanksgiving Day, have an open conversation with your child about what to expect. Discuss the menu and set realistic goals—such as trying two new foods or taking small bites of something unfamiliar.

Teach your child how to express their preferences politely. For example, instead of saying “I hate this,” they could say, “I’m not ready to try this yet.” This approach fosters respectful communication and reduces mealtime tension.

3. Try a Thanksgiving Dress Rehearsal

For children who are particularly hesitant about new foods or sensory experiences, consider hosting a “Thanksgiving dress rehearsal.” Serve small amounts of the dishes you plan to have on the big day in advance. Added bonus – let your child help with the cooking! This allows your child to explore new flavors and textures in a low-pressure environment. The key here is not to force them to “try a bite” or “just eat it,” but for them to see, smell, and interact with these less familiar foods.

Pediatric Dietitians, such as those at From the Start Nutrition, recommend introducing new foods gradually—sometimes it takes 10-15 exposures OR MORE for a child to accept a new flavor. By practicing beforehand, you can reduce anxiety and make the actual holiday meal more familiar, fun, and comforting.

4. Involve Your Child in Meal Prep and Cooking

Getting kids involved in cooking can encourage them to try new foods. Studies show that children are more likely to eat dishes they helped prepare. Assign simple tasks like stirring stuffing, sprinkling cheese on casseroles, or arranging rolls on a baking pan or plate. Involving kids in meal prep and cooking provides exposure to new ingredients without pressure. It also builds excitement about the meal and helps them feel invested in what’s being served.

5. Offer Tiny Portions and Food Bridges

Large portions can overwhelm picky eaters. Serve small amounts of new foods alongside familiar ones as “food bridges.” For example:

  • If your child likes mashed potatoes, offer sweet potato casserole as it has a similar texture.
  • Pair bread with gravy or cranberry sauce as a dipping option.

These small steps make trying new foods less intimidating while still exposing them to different flavors.

6. Avoid Pressure and Bribery

While it’s tempting to coax your child into eating more by offering dessert as a reward, experts advise against this tactic. Dr. Linsenmeyer explains that bribing with dessert elevates it as “special” while making other foods seem less desirable. Instead, normalize all foods by serving dessert alongside the meal or after without conditions.

Similarly, avoid pressuring your child to eat certain dishes or finish their plate—it often backfires by increasing resistance.

7. Focus More on Gratitude and Family Traditions

Thanksgiving is about more than just the meal—it’s an opportunity to teach gratitude and celebrate togetherness. Shift the focus from what’s on the plate to the meaning behind the holiday:

  • Share stories about Thanksgiving traditions.
  • Encourage non-food-related activities like playing games or watching football together.
  • Create gratitude lists as a family.

When children feel included in these traditions, they’re more likely to associate positive emotions with the holiday—even if they don’t eat much at dinner.

8. Manage Family Dynamics by Knowing What to Say

When it comes to managing family dynamics around your child’s eating habits, having prepared responses can help set boundaries and create a positive environment. Here are examples and scripts you can use when relatives or friends make comments about your child’s eating:

Examples of What to Say to Relatives and Friends:

1. When someone pressures your child to eat more:

        • Comment: “Take two more bites, and then you can be done.”
        • Response: “We trust [child’s name] to listen to their body and decide when they’re full. Thanks for respecting that!”

        2. When someone labels food as “good” or “bad”:

          • Comment: “Eat your vegetables—they’re healthy! Not too many sweets—they’re bad for you.”
          • Response: “We try to avoid labeling foods as good or bad. All foods have a place in our diet, and we let [child’s name] decide what works for them.”

          3. When someone comments on portion size:

            • Comment: “Wow, they’re eating a lot!”
            • Response: “Kids’ appetites can vary from day to day, just like adults’. We trust [child’s name] to eat what their body needs.”

            4. When someone criticizes your child’s preferences:

              • Comment: “Don’t be so picky—just eat it!”
              • Response: “[Child’s name] is still exploring new foods at their own pace. We don’t pressure them because we want them to enjoy mealtimes.”

              5. When someone questions your approach:

                • Comment: “Why did you bring special food? There’s plenty here!”
                • Response: “[Child’s name] has specific needs right now, and this is what works best for them. Thanks for understanding.”

                6. When someone offers unsolicited advice:

                  • Comment: “When I raised my kids, I made them eat everything on their plate.”
                  • Response: “I’m glad that worked for your family! We’ve chosen an approach that feels right for us, and we appreciate your support.”

                  7. When someone comments in front of your child:

                    • Comment: “You need to eat your vegetables.”
                    • Response (to the adult): “We prefer not to talk about [child’s name]’s eating habits in front of them. Thank you for helping us create a positive food environment.”

                    8. When someone compares your child to others:

                      • Comment: “Other kids their age eat everything!”
                      • Response: “Every child is different, and [child’s name] is learning at their own pace. We’re confident they’ll get there in time.”

                      Redirecting Conversations

                      If tensions arise or the conversation becomes uncomfortable, try redirecting the focus:

                      • “Let’s talk about something else—how was your trip last weekend?”
                      • “I really appreciate how much you care about [child’s name], but let’s focus on enjoying this meal together.”

                      Setting Boundaries Ahead of Time

                      Before gatherings, consider addressing potential issues proactively:

                      • “We’re working on building a healthy relationship with food for [child’s name], so we’d appreciate it if food-related comments could be avoided.”
                      • “It would mean a lot if we could keep mealtime conversations focused on gratitude or neutral topics rather than what anyone is eating.”

                      Sometimes comments from loved ones can make you second-guess yourself. Remind yourself and others that you’ve chosen an approach tailored to you and your child:

                      • “We’ve done a lot of research and are working with professionals who specialize in feeding challenges. This is the best path for our family.”
                      • “[Child’s name]’s needs are unique, and we’re confident this method is helping them develop a positive relationship with food.”

                      By staying calm, clear, and consistent in your responses, you can manage family and friend dynamics effectively while fostering a supportive environment for your child at mealtimes.

                      Final Thoughts

                      Thanksgiving should be about joy, connection, and gratitude—not stress over what’s eaten (or not eaten). By incorporating these tips:

                      • Bring familiar foods.
                      • Prepare beforehand.
                      • Involve kids in cooking.
                      • Set realistic expectations.
                      • Focus on gratitude and family traditions.
                      • Know how-to manage family/friend dynamics

                      You can create an inclusive environment where even picky eaters feel welcome at the table. Remember: It’s just one meal in their lifelong journey with food—and fostering positive experiences now will pay off later.

                      Happy Thanksgiving!

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                        beth conlon dietitian nutritionist new jersey

                        Hi! I’m Beth Conlon, PhD, MS, RDN


                        I'm so glad you're here!

                        As a Pediatric and Family Nutrition Expert and mom of 4, I truly understand the ups and downs of feeding children. This is a space where you can get tips and tricks that will help you with any feeding challenges, from picky eaters to eating disorders, and more. Additionally, I'm excited to share recipes that are perfect for families.

                        I can't wait to share this journey with you. If you need extra assistance, please contact me today and we can explore ways to work together.

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